Lil Ray Marsh

  • Submitted on time! May 24, 2020
nick
WWW

Wow this one was a blast. Walker County, Georgia is the article I went with. Feel free to look up more about this story, but would love thoughts on how the story comes across without background info. Those tangy hits on 2 and 3 are my wind powered melodica.

Lyrics:

A thousand year sentence
for Lil Ray Marsh
in Walker County, Georgia.
But the kid ain’t so bad.
Ya know he only went mad
from the mercury.

A thousand year sentence
for Lil Ray Marsh
in Walker County, Georgia.
He was supposed to deliver
the ashes of the dead.
But he handed out bags
of fine concrete instead.

Anonymous tips and something amiss
in Walker County, Georgia.
He left all those bodies out on the lawn,
grandma and grandpa down in the vault,
mamma and daddy stacked in the shed—
339.

A thousand year sentence
for Lil Ray Marsh
in Walker County, Georgia.
But the common law said
‘the dead is just dead,’
so he only did twelve and got off.



Looking for feedback on

Storytelling—by only listening to the lyrics (and not reading the wiki article), I'm curious how you feel about the story.

Discussion

  • 15 Comments
alechutson May 26, 2020 9:12pm

hah! i love this. so different from your usual vibe but still very much you.

excellent storytelling through the lyrics, and your vocal delivery helps drive it home. yeeehaw

laurawolf May 26, 2020 5:34pm

This is great! I think the storytelling is spot on- it’s not too explicit, just enough to hook the listener with creepy enough words/phrases. I felt like that created enough curiosity and I was able to use the remaining ~poetry~ to fill in the gaps. It made me feel like I was 8 years old again and listening to The Hurricane over and over until I figured it out hehe

nick May 26, 2020 5:35pm

well heck, thank you kindly

ryan.mp3 May 26, 2020 11:56am

Haha dude this is incredible. So well-executed. Definitely agree with @@juliapikeron the #chillywillies and @@Benon the brothers Coen. Re: storytelling — I think it landed! I definitely turned by head on that second to last stanza with the ‘out on the lawn’ and ‘stacked in the shed’ — still have some questions there lol. But I think that last verse really seals the deal of the whole narrative, as well as the “woo!”. Ends up being a hilarious albeit somewhat dark story. Great work, mate.

nick May 26, 2020 11:59am

this guy got caught with 339 decomposing bodies on the grounds of his crematorium, some years old, and had handed out concrete dust instead of ashes.

ryan.mp3 May 26, 2020 12:02pm

Yeah I think the only thing I didn’t get was that he owned a crematorium. Thought he was like, assigned by someone (presumably a crematorium owner if I were to think about it) to deliver ashes. Didn’t put together that the lawn and shed would be his place of business lol.

nick May 26, 2020 12:03pm

aha interesting—very fair point.

juliapiker May 25, 2020 3:23pm

Love this nicky. this is different from what I would expect from you which i love. love being surprised by you!

I also love that i’m hearing your voice super clearly- those harmonies givin me chilly willies.

beautiful beautiful track

nick May 25, 2020 4:28pm

#chillywillies 🙏

krismccarthy May 25, 2020 3:16pm

I LOVE THIS SO MUCH I feel like a cowboy. And the storytelling is absolutely perfect, like you chose the perfect details to add to make it feel like such a real story, its actually amazing

nick May 25, 2020 4:30pm

🐮 not sure which emoji best represents cowboy so here are both 🐴

Carseat May 24, 2020 9:38pm

Oh I love this.

nick May 25, 2020 4:31pm

🤘

Ben May 24, 2020 9:13pm

Hey @CoenBrothers, please make a movie of this song.

nick May 25, 2020 4:32pm

💰