I Know You Don't Know Why

  • Submitted on time! Feb 22, 2024
Dream Weaver

I dreamt there was a party // For someone you knew
Mike was running the place, // You were in his face, // And I, the rented bounce house
The children all collapsed into me // I was torn from too much strain
But then you deflated me // Rolled me up // and left me scrunched on the back lawn
I used to trace your face to calm my pate // But now you keep me wide awake shaking
You clothed my arm so peacefully // With no idea I was afraid of what you were doing to me

I don’t know if you knew what you were doing

But I know that you don’t know why
Inches from your face // Was a body of a boy that you’d loved
But what did you care // You were everywhere
While I was sat up, scared of you
You were so selfish with me
Tossing me like a dirty shirt to a chair when you were the one who went to stain me
I used to trace your face to calm my pate // But now you keep me wide awake shaking
You clothed my arm so peacefully // With no idea I was afraid of what you were doing to me
I don’t know if you knew what you were doing
But I know that you don’t know why


SO excited to be back. Decided to re-dip my toes into the pool after a second.

I’ve actually had this song in the back of my brain for about a year now — I wrote it in tandem with the record I put out in September and it has a similar context, but this one is linked to a specific event in time:

I had quite a horrendous nightmare that my then-partner was throwing a birthday party (for some child I didn’t know) and they put up a bounce house — for some reason, it was from the bounce house’s point of view, aka I was the bounce house. Eventually the kids put a hole in me (ow), but my partner was ignoring the whole thing because they were extensively complaining to their father. At some point (~3 hours into the dream — yes, I was that stuck), they finally noticed, and instead of trying to inflate me back up, they crunched me into the lawn (which hurt). I woke up quite literally shaking, sweating, etc. and my then-partner was sleeping soundly next to me, cradled into my arm. I drew away and curled into a lil ball and grappled with that reality for a little while and then struggled to go back to sleep. I never told them it happened. Then, while I was writing the record a year or so later, I remembered that moment and immediately began writing it down — it’s such a specific moment in time that needed to be captured.


I hope to release it from the back burner one day because it’s so unique from my other writing. I wanted to keep it as a simple pill to swallow, like a baby la-la-la version of the album. This assignment helped me to stitch the production together — I think the interweaving is quite lovely. I kept most of the production improvised (the little vox and the guitar work in the background).


Looking for feedback on

This is the first time I've submitted something this produced here, so let me know what you think of that!


Rmal March 4, 2024 8:04pm

Really liking the vocal – such an indie sound with layers. The build of the low frequencies fills the room at 2:00. Can’t say I pick up on the lyrics – not because they’re lost, it’s because they are stitched into the music so it’s one experience.

alechutson March 2, 2024 6:18pm

I love the production and musical decisions on this track, from the clean acoustic down to the ominously unsettling sub bass. Your voice sounds great, and the lyrics are potent and evocative. No notes from me, it all works for me!

juliapiker March 2, 2024 2:37pm

Oh yeah. I fucking love this. Your voice feels really smooth and well mixed. I love that you doubled the guitar and I love how bright it feels- I would cut a teensy tiny bit of the high end so that it’s not competing with your voice.

Great production. I would keep an eye out for reverb giving way to a little bit of mud when everything comes into play together. I love the pause at 2:51 returning to the main melody.

Really great work

Ryan March 2, 2024 12:22pm

Wow, I love this submission. Great work.

Voice sounds SO good, Darcy! And the patience in how the song moves is outstanding. A thought: maybe in the later verses, that first chord could change half-way through? It’s so rad that it stays on that chord for so long as you currently have it, but breaking it later on could be a cool development device.

Mix sounds killer. I agree with the breath notes that @@Ben mentioned. Guitars, background vox, ethereal stuff all sounds awesome to me. Maybe a slight cut in the low-end on the ethereal stuff. But sounds great for the most part.

Shout out to the break at 2:44 and re-entranced at 2:50. So good. Has a little bit of a St. Deviation’s vibe to me (wink wink @nick).

Carseat March 2, 2024 2:15pm

Ooooo… I like the idea of the chord change — I’ll be sure to mess around with that! And thanks re: voice: I was actually quite sick for this, but I am glad it sounded good — maybe I should be sick more often lol.

nick March 2, 2024 9:22am

Immediately compelling—very strong overall, well done. Your voice sounds great, and I enjoy the production quality on it. The arrangement is also very well crafted. I’m curious about the really deep kind of rumbling that comes in around ~1:18. It adds a feeling, non-musically, but more in the way of a soundscape. For me, it becomes a little distracting in certain parts, so I’d maybe reel it back in the really melodic moments, and have it stick out more intentionally and briefly in other sections. Just a thought. Most of all, just glad to hear you again!

Ryan March 2, 2024 12:18pm

Yes, that rumbling caught my ear as well! I like the idea of flooding it in and pulling it out. But I mostly love it. What a great arrangement tool.

Carseat March 2, 2024 2:17pm

Thanks! That rumbling is a low synth that I warped around… I honestly couldn’t hear it that well in my setup, so thanks for mentioning how it sounds. I’ll mess around with cropping it out at points — I like the idea of making it a special appearance.

EliasSZ February 29, 2024 7:03pm

The sound of your guitar and vocals are SO nice on this. It’s super intimate in a really inviting way, though I agree with @@Benthat cutting back a little bit on the breaths might be nice. I wouldn’t want to lose the intimacy at all though. I think this mix really effectively keeps the arrangement an important part of the song, while keeping the vocals and guitar right front and forward, almost to the point of obfuscating the details of the background – the periphery of it all feels really dream-esque in that way that we have super clear images of parts of our dreams, while other bits fade into obscurity.

Couple other things I really liked: the way the background ambience slowly swells in, the quiet background vocal chords I’m hearing at moments like 2:15, the downward movement of the chords at around 1:50.

Carseat March 2, 2024 2:18pm

Hey — thanks so much for the feedback! I agree with the breaths, I’ll be sure to take a few of the not-interesting ones out! I appreciate your note on my placement of the different elements — I wanted to create the misty mid-morning-brain-fog effect, and I’m glad it came through!

Ben February 26, 2024 12:28pm

I love the recording of this—so crisp and clear, and I like how the reverb comes and goes! There’s some lush arranging as well, but it’s never overpowering—the guitar and vox are front and center the whole time. The vocals are very close mic’ed and compressed, so we’re hearing each breath pretty loudly—it’s an intimate effect, but I might cut out or tone down some of the breaths.

Carseat March 2, 2024 2:19pm

Hey, thanks for the feedback! I’m take note! The intimacy was important to me, but I agree that the breaths almost take away from that effect at times.