Char Story

  • Submitted on time! Jun 21, 2020
nick
Once Upon A Time

Live recording, literally haven’t listened to it yet. Hope you enjoy this gruesome twist on a classic.

 

LYRICS:

Two brothers lived atop the Earth
And Each received a gift so gleeful
Arkin, the eldest, all fortune of worth
And Clarence, the younger, to care for the people.

Then in time, dear Clarence did measure
Perhaps my people would surely be delighted
For just one piece of Arkin’s great treasure
And so to this query was his brother invited.

Arkin swiftly scolded and coldly declared,
“This fortune will be mine for the rest of my days.”
So Clarence knowing his brother impaired
Promptly dealt a blow and set him ablaze.

Once a year forevermore Clarence would deliver afar
A piece of Arkin’s fortune to the good—and to the evil, his char.



Looking for feedback on

Mainly storytelling. Does the story come through? (similar to last week, i know). Would love some specific alternate verse/line/word suggestions

Discussion

  • 9 Comments
nurphgun July 5, 2020 4:27pm

I love how you savor and chew on the lyrics. I imagined Jack Black singing it with a devilish grin and a gleam in his eye. I follow the story and I like it, but I’m not sure I know which tale you’re re-telling 🤔

nick July 5, 2020 5:13pm

man travels the world once a year giving good things to the nice people, and bits of char to the naughty people. Know what I’m sayyyin

nurphgun July 5, 2020 5:13pm

ohohohohohHO-HO-HO!

Ben June 23, 2020 1:44pm

how delightful

nick July 2, 2020 9:48am

🔥

ryan.mp3 June 22, 2020 9:52am

I cannot get over “perhaps my people would surely be delighted.” I’ve laughed out loud four times over that. Good job wringing the fun out of a sonnet.

nick July 2, 2020 9:41am

hahaha *emoji of guy shrugging*

Carseat June 21, 2020 9:26pm

Incredible. Love the different voices. Folk shanty vibes.

nick July 2, 2020 9:48am

🍻